Category Archives: Uncategorized

Career of Evil by Robert Galbraith

I have tried to start this blog post 3 times already, and so far nothing has worked. So this will have to do.

A considerable amount of time has certainly passed between the last post and this but, like the father who went out for groceries 9 years ago and only returned today, let us all just carry on as if nothing has happened.

Honey, I’m home.

Today I shall attempt a short review of the latest Robert Galbraith novel, Career of Evil.

Career of Evil is the third instalment in Robert Galbraith’s  series, centering around private detective Cormoran (it’s kind of like Cameron, but isn’t) Strike and his extremely loveable (seriously) side-kick Robin Ellacott.

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I’ve never seen a book pose so hard in my entire life.

Without giving anything away, the story begins when a package by an unknown courier is delivered to my beloved Robin. Attached is a note containing lyrics by the band Blue Öyster Cult, which on its own could actually be a nice gesture, if it wasn’t sullied by a woman’s severed leg.

Strike (yes, we are on second name basis) is subsequently convinced that the perpetrator is one of four people, all of whom are from his past and with some reason to hate his guts.

What I loved about this book, which differed from the previous two, was that the narrative was split roughly 50/50 between both Robin and Strike. As we are taken through the case trying to whittle down the list of suspects, we are also taken back in time and given a large insight into the pasts of both protagonists. It feels as if the first two books introduced the characters whereas this third part has truly opened them up to us.

As an added feature, we are also shown parts of the story from the point of view of the killer. As gruesome as these sections were, I thought they were a brilliant touch to a great book.

Despite the fact that ‘The Cuckoo’s Calling’ and ‘The Silkworm’ set the bar very high in my mind, ‘Career of Evil’ not only met my expectations, but pretty much raised them even further for the next book. Good luck JK- I mean Robert.

If I was to criticise the book at all I would say that perhaps there could have been more twists added to the story, but then I would instantly retort by stating that the lack of a ‘twist at every turn’ added a realness to the novel.

At least I tried.

I am still struggling to decide whether this book or the first was my favourite in the series so far. If I were to go purely with my gut, the gut being the most literary-appreciative organ in the body after all, I would have to say that The Cuckoo’s Calling just about edges it. Nevertheless, Career of Evil is still a definite page turner.

It will make you miss your stop on the bus or the tube. It will make you laugh out loud at parts and may even break your heart at others. Simply put, It’s like an Adele song on steroids.

If you haven’t read the series yet then you should start questioning your life choices and maybe place me in charge of them.

Overall rating: 9/10.

Lastly, as the series will be undergoing a TV adaptation, I would like to formally nominate Greg Davies for the part of Cormoran Strike. Watch this space.

Thank you for spending your not-so-valuable time reading my blog post. Feel free to use the comment section to your fingers content. Discuss the book, discuss me, discuss global warming, discuss the sheriff but do not, I repeat DO NOT, discuss the deputy.

Happy New Year and good morrow.

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To Infinity… And Beyond!

So…. We’re already two days into 2k15 (whoop!). The years are really flying by now! I mean, it’s hard to imagine that in just… 985 year’s.. Nothing much will have changed except they’ll live underwater.

Wow.

To answer your burning suspicions…..No, I didn’t just make those lyrics up. And Yes, you have just caught me……… Busted.

Apparently 2015 is also the year Marty visits in Back to the Future part 2. Not that I remember much of the movie, but that actually saddens me, right down to my Apple seeded core, as the only part of the film I do remember were the hoverboards…. Hoverboards!!! Why isn’t that a thing yet? Back to the Future had it, The Jetson’s had it, The Flinstones were close….. I’m sure we should be there by now, it’s Two Thousand and Fifteen for crying out quiet !! (It’s 2 am)

Between me and you.. The closest I’ve ever came to a hoverboard was an eventful afternoon in Year 9, all those decade ago…. Fuel your imagination tanks and allow your mind to visualise a strapping young Indian lad, in the prime of his youth. The looks of Brad Pitt coupled with the voice of Mariah Carey (puberty was not privy to this story as of yet)… And don’t forget the glasses of course. That…. Was yours truly. The Big Cahoona.

Now picture this young man fleeing for his life from his 14 year old 6 foot 7 Nigerian friend, who’s only intention that lunch time was to slap his giant of a hand on your, admittedly spherical, head.. While he utters the most diabolic of phrases:

‘Heavy rain drop.’

Imagine our hero as he runs for the sheer safety of his brain cells. He lunges through the doors of the library, paying no heed to the ‘No Lunging’ sign. Almost out of breath, he turns the corner, only to be faced with the most perilous of sights. A staircase. Running the first 6 with his captor gaining on him every step of the way, he sees no alternative other than to leap the remainder.

Surviving the jump, all seems well until he turns his immaculate, ball of a head round to his next task. A second flight.

With no time to spare he simply carries on, haphazardly placing each foot infront of the next, all the while cursing the school’s darned architecture. Though his peripheral vision isn’t the strongest, it doesn’t take much to suddenly notice…. The raising of the hand.

The clouds have burst. Terrential downpour is forecast.

Without pausing to think, a good 10 steps remain, his future is uncertain yet he leaves everything to luck as he throws his little legs into the air.

The rest of the story is pretty self explanatory to be honest. I flew. For about 6 steps… I flew. As soon as the freedom bells in my head started ringing however, gravity brought me crashing right back down to Earth, with my foot landing on the most peculiar of objects….

A random little biscuit neatly placed on the second step.

According to eye witnesses (who weren’t even there!!) My foot landed on the biscuit and together, as if transported into an alternate cartoon reality, we (me and the biscuit) were propelled about 50 feet in the air before coming crashing down to our untimely demise.

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Look at it..... Just laying there... All smug.. and crumby.

And that, ladies and gentlefish, is a true story. If you’re wondering why I just narrated it for you then don’t ask me, as I don’t have a clue. I was meant to talk about some of my new years resolutions actually, but there ya go! I guess that post will have to wait til next year now -_-

Who would even put a biscuit on a step man ?????? I just don’t get it.

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Thanks for reading, if you liked any of that, even if it’s just the picture of the Digestive biscuit then Share, Comment and Followwww.………………… Innit.

p.s The lovely picture of the biscuit was from www.morguefile.com BIGUP

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The Mother Of All Procrastinators

I don’t know how I always end up here! It’s 2 am, pitch black, and I’m just sat here typing away on Google Keep. Actually… In case my dad reads this (he says he doesn’t but I’m not ready to believe that just yet) it’s actually 4 pm and I’m writing this in a well earned revision break! …….. Yeah that’ll do.

Anywho. Seeing as though I haven’t got a whole lot going on in my life apart from some hard-core procrastination
– Note to self, Procrastination could be a great band name
Another Note to self…… Make a band.
Why don’t I tell you all about the greatest piece of procrastination that has EVER. EXISTED!!!!!!

ARE YOU EXCITED!?!?!?!
ARE YOU WITH ME?????
ARE YOU SCREAMING THESE WORDS INSIDE YOUR HEAD???? If so please get yourself checked out. These aren’t good signs my friend.

What I am rambling about.. Is a game. But not just any old PlayStation or Xbox game. PSSSHT oh hell naw. I’m talking about the kind of game where you literally spend yeaaaaars of your life, your golden years, locked inside the darkest shadows of the most isolated corner of your house… Sapped of all emotion, vigorously clicking away on the only object left which feels ‘right’ in your hands………………… The mouse.

A sick, twisted, time consumingly WONDERFUL ga-
No. I don’t even think I can call it a game. For, as long as it is in your life, it becomes just that. Life. 

If you know me, or if you too have become a victim to this most leisurely of all leisures, then you will be aware of what I am speaking of. In fact I can see you now.. Nodding away in slow motion with your eyes closed, swaying your head in the guiltiest of fashions …… Jeez put some pants on while you read at least! And close your curtains!!  What with the nosy neighbours and all …

Without further adew: Runescape.

Just seeing it, written there, oh how it brings back memories.

I remember the long summer’s of the 2000s. The sun smiling down on everything in it’s wake. Kids running through the streets, a mixture of laughter and football’s flying through the air. Ice cream men showing up just in the nick of time to serve up happiness. I remember the whole lot; jumpers for goalposts, football’s stuck under cars and the last minute goals that put you on the map! But most of all ….. Most of all! I remember the double glazed and surprisingly spotless window pane that separated me from all that hustle and bustle as I sold my last batch of steel bars for the day.

I miss the summers…

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Nothing quite beats gazing into a pixelated World lost in cyberspace.....

If you don’t know what Runescape is….. Get out. I joke (please stay). Baaaasically it is a huge online world where you create a player, think of the coolest username you can..
Footymagic – XxGangstaMageKillaxX was taken *sigh*
Go through the most boring tutorial known to man and then after all that… You do whatever the hell you want bebbeh!!! Except that! Naughty.

Now of course, being a game, there were some rather cool features to this secret online life of yours. You had the chance to practise magic, try a hand at archery, craft amulets and other goods, slay dragons and many more!

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Sitting here... As you do ...

But I didn’t have time for all that Dragon slaying nonsense! I had other plans, and since apparently my ultimate goal in life was to be a child in the early to mid 1800‘s, mining rocks seemed a much more fitting activity, albeit electronically. I used to spend HOURS….. sat in front of a computer screen with my jaw touching the floor. Drool galore. And I used to click. On a rock.  Every day. Without fail.
For 400 years.

And if I wasn’t clicking on a rock I’d spend my nights calculating how many rocks I’d click on the next day and how much gp (the currency) that would amount to. 

It got so bad that I distinctively remember one night walking into my brother’s room. Eyes aglow, just after they had introduced the grand exchange and all I remember saying to him, in all seriousness, was:
‘I’m going to manipulate the trade market.’ Followed by a well rehearsed speech about the fluctuations in various stocks and other non-household goods.

Oh I could go on and on but I’m pretty sure that half of you that started reading this haven’t actually got this far (is half being optimistic?). So therefore I’m just going to end with a few quotes that you’d usually see in a typical ‘scapin session:

Flash2:wave: Rune scimi 32k!!!

Flash:scroll: Steel bars 250 ea.

Ur dadz a n00b stp followin me

Less sort dis beef in da wildie u punk ***

Special treat press Alt + f4 to get free 1mil

If u type ur password in it comes up starred! Look *********** !!!!!!!

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Thanks for reading! If you liked the post and want to hear more of what I’ve got to say…. Then give me money. Srsly…. I need food.
Orrrrrr just follow away and don’t forget to share the site on the Twittergram or the Facebooks or whatever you crazy kids are using these days. Ahhhhh Bebo… That’s the one!

Oh and comment!!! …. Peace!

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A first visit to Old Trafford

As the title tooooootally suggests… Today I’ll be talking about…..
Ponies. (Awww) .. I jest I jest.
Definately saving the Pony post for a while yet! No.. today I’ll tell you all a story :O

A story with zero purpose. No beginning. Barely a middle. And not much of an end.

How exciting!!!

So a couple days ago, on Tuesday last week to be precise, I visited the glorious city of Manchester to watch, none other than, Manchester United play at Old Trafford. Even though it was a seemingly mundane match (against Stoke – no offence) the stadium was still brimming with fans, around 75,000 to be precise-ish!

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Alllllllll thanks to this badboy

In short, it was a madness. Now I’ve been to watch a few games in my time, but none quite like this. Sitting next to the Stretford end itself, a constant stream of hilarious chants, jibes and casual abuse filled my little ears, all under the great banner of ‘banter’.

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Stunning...

I have to say though, that once you’re a part of the environment, it takes a strange hold on you.

Surrounded by tens of thousands of fans. Lost in a sea of red with all eyes focused on the island at the centre. Stewed in a melting pot of raw emotion.

It was under these very conditions that I lost all self-control. All humanity. Filling my lungs with all the air I could fit, I threw-

-No. I launched. I launched caution to the wind! And I screamed, with all the eloquence that naturally comes with being a semi-active blogger, I screamed…

‘PISS OFF REF!’

And honestly speaking I have never felt any sweeter relief.

I told you this story had no purpose! But did you listen? I suppose if you got this far then.. No, no you did not.You little rebel you.

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After reading through everything up there ^ it looks like I’ve given a fairly negative review of the whole experience, but because I can’t muster up the effort to re-write it all I shall just add:

Watching a match live is truly amazing and I most certainly reccommend it to any footballing and non-footballing fans alike. You’re constantly kept at the edge of your seat and feel one with the crowd. Watching the same game on the Telly wouldn’t compare at all in my expert opinion.

Plus if you’re lucky enough, like I was, you too might see the living legend, Marouane Fellaini, score and help your team to a 2-1 victory.

OHHHHHHHH DAVID DE GEEEEEAAAAAA 

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A Post from the Heart

As I sit here on this cold winters night; gazing deeply into the abyss unfolding before me, listening intently for the faintest of sounds, lost within the complex fortress of my own mind.. I can’t help but wonder…..

a) Why is there a random man sat next to me ???????????
b) Why is he bald??????
c) Why did I stop blogging.

I am fully aware that, deep down within your cyberhearts, you’ve all been filled with worry and concern for me! But worry not for I am fine, or as fine as a final year uni student could hope to be I suppose.

For months I’ve been convincing myself that I haven’t been writing due to a ‘tremendous work load.’ But we All know that’s a lie! Procrastination. Population: Me. 

The sad and bitter truth of the matter however is this… Brace yourselves…

No, seriously, brace yourself. hold a desk, hold the edge of your bed, hold your lover, hold… yourself. Whatever it takes!

The truth is that I just can’t seem to find anything worth writing about :O (Ohhhhhhhhh the horror! Ohhhhhh The shame!)

My life right now is a packet of Walkers Ready Salted… when I’m secretly wanting Sensations Thai sweet chilli…. You feel me??? You get me??? Ofcourse you do.

At this not-so-very low point in my life, the only solace I could find were in the wise words of Professor Albus Dumbledore. And they are as follows:

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Dumbledore got some mad flow for real.

Don’t worry! You’re not hallucinating. You’re not stoned off your head on some chronic bud (well you might be – in which case – 420 blaze it dank)

Dumbledore! said these words. the greatest wizard of our time! Was a crackhead. But do you know what these words say to me??

They say:
‘Daanyaal. Write. Even if it’s the most mundane thing in the world, write. Even if you barely find it funny yourself! Write. Because…. Someone, Somewhere, might be having the least productive day imaginable, stumble on your blog, read a post (!!!) and maybe just maybe… They’ll even crack a smile. Even though they won’t! They might.’

And I shall end the end of my long hiatus on that.

P.s. I recently went to the Warner bros Harry Potter studios tour London and it was
*high pitched voice*
Awwweeesomeeee!!

P.p.s. In retrospect I could have just written about my visit to the studio but AAAAAAH WELL !

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A Journey through Time

Recently, I decided to embark on a journey. And no, not a physical journey as that would require actual movement on my part.

This journey is waaaay cooler though believe me, it’s a journey……… Through time (*.*) (wow) ! A journey which can only be undertaken via the great medium of books! Orrrrr television documentaries. Orrr wikipedia I suppose. But in this case, at least, it’s through books.

Specifically speaking I decided to study Islamic history, not in extreme detail but just for a broad overview of events.

So if any amongst you are interested in this subject then I highly reccomend the following books to create a good platform for learning but also for further reading, should you wish.

Or just read on for the hell of it.

The first book I read was ‘Muhammad: His Life Based On the Earliest Sources’ by Martin Lings. This can only be described as a gem of a book. It was nicely written, not too long and overall an easy read. Although I was familiar with a lot of the history of the Prophet Muhammad, may peace and blessing be upon him, after reading this book I realised how little I actually knew/remembered.   

I highly reccommend anyone who’s interested in learning about the Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, or about Islamic history in general to read through Martin Lings’ brilliant biography.

‘The History of the Khalifahs who took the Right Way’ by Jalal ad-Din as-Suyuti was the second book I read. After reading a biography of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, I felt it fitting to read about the 4 Khalifahs who came after him, as well as a short extract on the 5th too. What appealed to me most about this book was that it was very neatly organised. For each caliph, there were little sections such as their description or what they accomplished as Caliph and so forth. Overall it was a concise yet informative read. Recommended for anyone looking to see how Islam expanded after the death of the Prophet, may peace and blessings be upon him.

The next book on the list was ‘Lost Islamic History: Reclaiming Muslim Civilisation from the Past’ by Firas Alkhateeb and as of yet am only half way through it. The book starts off by giving brief summaries of the lives of the Prophet SAW and the first 4 Khalifahs, and then transporting you into the times that follow. From what I have seen so far I can tell you that Islamic history is by no means a simple affair. You learn about Dynasty after dynasty. Dynasties within dynasties. Divisions, battles, treaties and much much more. 

It is a wonder how the author so skillfully packed everything inside this neat and rather  compact book!

The Golden Age of Science and Maths, in the cultural capital of Baghdad, was especially interesting as we are shown how Muslim scientists and leading thinkers pioneered the way for much of the technology we use today. It was extremely interesting but at the same time deeply saddening, considering how different the situation is now.

My overall impression so far is of sheer wonder. It is amazing how, in just around 300 years, Islam had spread from one Man with a mission to one of the largest dynasties in the world at that time. It just goes to show how much can be accomplished when unity exists between the leaders and followers.  And when peace is present throughout.

But anyways I suppose its time to end this fairly long (by this sites standards!) post and leave by saying, again!, that if any of you are interested in learning about Islamic history then these books would definitely be good starting points.

If you have any other books which you can reccomend then write them in the comments below 🙂 or just write in the comments for the hell of it. That’s how I get my kicks apparently.

I don’t know what I’ll read next but if I don’t say on here then maybe you can somehow stalk my goodreads account, if anyone is actually interested! Ya crafty buggers.

Taraa for now then

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A Special Day…

Comrades! Today was a special day. We are blessed to have lived through such a momentous occasion.
‘What was today, oh great one?’ I hear you ask. Fear not, my children! For I shall answer that question in a few words time, Shirley.

Today was, according to twitter, National Burger Day! (Woo)

Therefore it is only fitting that I tell you about a burger that is very close (but hopefully not too close for health reasons!) to my heart. Let’s get personal up in here brahs.

*violin plays*

I know you readers are spread out across the globe BUT should any of you ever pass by the great city of Bradford (BD7 to be exact) then it is a must that you try out this, what can only be described as, the Beast Between the Buns!

You may have guessed it already, but the burger which I am speaking of today is, nothing but, the world renowned:
Drum roll please….
Euro’s Tower Burger!

Oh yeah !

Now this isn’t one of your;
clean cut, nicely packed, good-for-your-health kinda burgers oh no! It’s dutty as hell, a teensy bit wonkeh and may induce bowel movements, and then some.

But by George does it hit the spot.

It is a sheer testament to the burger that, despite that mean and slightly exaggerated though-not-too-exaggerated description I just gave, the masses will always go crawling back for more.

Now you might be thinking this to be like any other burger but my friend you couldn’t be more wrong. Here’s how an encounter with this burger will go:
You order the burger
You bite into the burger
You begin to lose all hope in humanity
You teeter onto the edge of insanity
BUT THEN!
You’re tongue discovers the most sweetest of sensations
A Hash.
Bloody.
Brown.
Phwoar… The rest speaks for itself really.
YOU BECOME!!!! THE BURGER!!!

If you’re especially lucky, the ever so lovely workers will even stash a little chicken wing inside your chips! And that’s not creepy at all…

But there you have it. The best burger in Bradford, nay! The best burger in the world!

If you are ever fortunate enough to pop down, say Daanyaal sent you and you might just get a funny look ’cause, to be honest, I’m not on first name basis with any of the staff there.

Talk about that free advertising!

P.s. Euros recently changed their name to Kings
Who even knows why ):
Location: Next to the post office near Uni.

Peace.

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My encounter with Art

Today, my dear readers, I witnessed something worth sharing. Something which truly… Truly! Took my breath away.

There it was, a piece of Art, so innocent yet at the same time so profound. An object so awe-inspiring that words themselves cannot do it justice.

It was one of those things which, at the smallest of glances, can tear you apart, right down to your very core and then simultaneously re-build you into something you’d never thought you could become.

The circle of life itself is etched into this masterpiece.

So without further ado:

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Banksy who?

You see, what this artist has captured, so economically, is that freedom is not something which can simply be written onto a wall and forced into the readers minds!

Nuh-uuuh Girlfriend.

Freedom, by its own definition, is against this very idea! This idea is against humanity itself! It quite simply goes against every single law of nature known, and unknown, to man! And to woman for that matter!

What our artist has achieved, other than simply leaving a sentence unfinished, is that he has allowed the wall… Yes, the very wall itself! To become a blank canvas. An unmarked atlas for the reader’s mind to be mapped onto! A theoretical bubble in which to place the speech of the viewer’s own heart.

Our anonymous artist has come to the remarkable realisation that:
Freedom is in the eye of the beholder…

Just let that sink in folks.

If your mind says ‘Free Palestine’, then the wall has decreed it so! If your mind screams ‘Free Oven Chips!!!’, then that is also by all means perfectly okay!!!! If not a tad bit weird.

How many thoughts have resonated off this very wall, and have embedded themselves into the very depths of space and time?? A mere mortal such as myself could never say.

So, in essence, what I want to say is that; at best, you come across a piece of contemporary art (whatever that means) such as this, once in a lifetime. I am fortunate enough to have come across one. I only hope that the rest of you are lucky enough too, some day.

Thank you for reading.

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Risk Everything – Poem for Palestine

The following is a poem I wrote about a month ago regarding the situation in Gaza and, more specifically, about the killing of 4 boys on a beach. Read and share…

Risk Everything

8 players. 1 pitch. 4 boys a side.
Sounds like some kind of advert for Nike
Without the floodlights.. or referees
Just playing with heart, playing for pride

‘I’ll be Neymar’ – Muhammed Ramiz
Skips one.. skips two.. and slots it with ease
‘Then I’m Ronaldo!’ The young boy said
As he gallops off, into the breeze

Boy of just 10, Zakaria Ahed
Watched by crowds, if not all in his head
He gives it his all, right from the start
Filling the defenders hearts full of dread

Run for minutes. Hours. Time plays no part.
Only clock present. Tick of the heart.
Blue becomes red. Day turns to eve.
Such glorious scenes have to be art.

‘First to 10 wins. Let’s keep this one brief’
Such reasoned words, from Ahed Atif
The score’s 9 all, rather quite rare
A time for heroes. A time to believe.

‘Cross       the          ball!’
A shout in the air.
Determined to try. Daring to dare.

Steadies himself. Eyesight is locked.
Ready to strike. Trigger is cocked.

Ball soars in.  Tearing the sky
He leaps into
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing
Ready to              fly

‘Overhead Kick!’ the crowd goes wild
No one can stop him, he’s Muhammed Ismail !

Hangs there forever. Time holds
It’s breath
Oblivious as to what happens next

Foot meets ball. Then comes a
Bang!
Smashing the floor. He greets the sand.

A piece of shrapnel.. Rips open his chest
He shudders he shakes then lays down to rest.

Eyes on fire. Vision gone red.
No screams. No thoughts.
No
Tears
Shed.

As for the rest, they scream and they run
But moving targets are always more fun

Crows are hungry to join in the fray
As 4 little boys rot and decay

4 innocent lives lost from the world
With stories that were still yet to unfurl
4 little boys…. Does it not make you upset?
That their laughter was deemed that much of a threat?
4 helpless children. Lay dead on the ground
As the World looks on without making a sound

But amongst all the flesh and the entrails and the slime
Lays a blood spattered ball… Just over the line.

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By Daanyaal

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Tokyo Ghooouuuuuuuuul

For those readers (all 12 of you out there! :* ) who aren’t into Anime or Manga…. This will seem like a pretty childish/lame/creepy/OMGgetalife kinda post.

But ah well! You’re here so you might as well carry on reading right?.. Right?…

Anywhoo I just wanted to write about an A-maaaaaazing Anime (Japanese cartoon) I’ve seen recently; namely, Tokyo Ghoul.

Without spoiling the story of it all too much, in essense, it is about a World infested by these; supernatural, vampire-like, human eating and also human resembling creatures known as Ghouls.

The great thing about this show however is that we see things from the perspective of the ghouls, get an inside scoop of their own struggles and generally learn to realise that a lot of them aren’t the monsters they’re made out to be…

DEEEEEEEP
Naughty humans!

But yeah anyways the moral of the overall plot I believe is that, instead of the constant persecution, if there ever is to be real peace between the two.. Then communication and understanding is key.. Ignorance doesn’t seem so bliss anymore!

But in the mean time some badass fighting sequences shan’t go amiss.

In conclusion!! The moral of myyyyy story is that you should definitely go and watch this show because its:

Proper Sick Br00o

And there’s only 8 episodes so far so why not ???

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